Learning, Forgiving, and Moving Forward

You know those moments that make us wish we had a magic wand to fix it all? We stumble, fumble, and sometimes, we're like whirlwinds leaving a trail of 'oops' and 'sorry's' behind us. And then we pick ourselves back up, we push our errors to the edge of our ethers and we hope we've patched things up, convince ourselves we've finally grasped the lesson and won't cause harm again..until then unexpectedly and yet of course inevitably, once again, we fall from grace. 

Suddenly we find ourselves swallowing our hearts in shame, spiralling into thoughts: 'What's wrong with me?', 'Why can't I just be better?', 'I end up hurting everyone.' And then, those thoughts start shaping our emotions, reigniting those deep-rooted beliefs that whisper, 'I am not good enough.'

How Human

As I put these words together, I find solace in the word 'we'. It's this 'we', us humans, our shared humanity that renders us prone to stumble, to be imperfect, to encompass the entire spectrum of behaviours, emotions, and thoughts that unite us as a being. If perfection was our nature, solely capable of goodness, our journey here would be meaningless, devoid of lessons. Our growth springs from the contrasts we experience, the shades that shape us.

I believe we've arrived in this world to embrace the full spectrum of humanity within ourselves, to confront our shadows, dive into the depths of our darkness and sit with the discomfort that comes from understanding that sometimes as Tay so perfectly puts it, 'it's me, I'm the problem it's me'.

To err is innately human; it's intricately woven into our fabric. Embracing this truth and moving beyond it, trusting that even the most altruistic souls can stumble, may grant us peace. My personal struggle doesn't lie in understanding this concept intellectually; it's more about the fear of progressing past a mistake. It's the worry that choosing forgiveness over self-condemnation might make me indifferent to causing hurt. Thus, I find myself frozen in the face of fear, suffocated by the suspense of erring again, panicked by the prospect of being perceived as 'flawed'—being human.

Trust Yourself

I am learning that trusting yourself  in forgiving your mistakes is a journey rooted in reflection and gentle accountability. Embracing our imperfections isn’t an invitation to freely make mistakes and we are allowed to trust in our innate goodness that we would not abide by that 'free pass'. It's a journey of growth, a constant unfolding, and a gentle stride ahead. It's the realisation that our humanity entails stumbling blocks, yet with each fall, we gather strength.

The Beauty of Bareness

And yet, there's a remarkable beauty in witnessing the vulnerabilities of others—those moments when we catch a glimpse of someone's imperfections, their raw fears, their perceived flaws, and what the world might label as faults; and we realise, 'I'm not alone'. When we encounter such moments of authenticity, where pretenses fade and authenticity reigns, it's like discovering a shared kinship in our shared humanness. We realize that beneath our varied experiences and perceptions, lies a common thread of imperfection and struggle. And in that shared space, empathy flourishes, compassion grows, and the walls between us crumble, leaving behind a sense of unity—an unspoken understanding that none of us are solitary islands but rather interconnected beings on this journey of being beautifully imperfect together.

A Gentle Reminder

Amidst the bustling symphony of worldly whispers, there’s this subtle, gentle reminder echoing through that suggests we ought to have everything neatly pieced together. It feels like we’re on an endless chase, running towards an ethereal concept of perfection, akin to grasping hold of a cloud in the sky. But perfection, in its flawless entirety, is as elusive as it is enchanting, a mirage we ardently pursue, failing to realise that the beauty often lies in the imperfections, the crinkles, the quirks, and the colourful array of nuances that paint the canvas of our lives. As John Steinbeck so beautifully said, 'And now that you don't have to be perfect, you can be good'.

Embracing Forgiveness

When we grant ourselves forgiveness, it's an act of embracing our vulnerabilities. It's a nod to the fact that every stumble, every error, and every miscalculation are threads intricately woven into the fabric of our existence. These moments, though seemingly flawed, are the very fibers that contribute to the richness of our experiences. Forgiveness toward ourselves isn't a dismissal of responsibility; it's a deep understanding that being fallible is an innate part of our human essence. It's an invitation to practice self-compassion, to honor our journey with kindness, and to recognize that within our imperfections lie invaluable lessons waiting to be unearthed.

Turning Oops into Lessons

Remember that awkward moment, the one that lingers in your thoughts like a well-worn melody? The one that suddenly flashes before your eyes as you walk through the streets and your whole body contorts into shivers of shame...or is that just me?! Heheh. We all carry those little mishaps, those instances we wish we could hit rewind on. But here’s the delightful part—within each slip-up resides a gentle teacher, quietly whispering life’s profound lessons in their own quirky way.  These little blunders? They're secret whispers from the universe, offering us unexpected gifts, gently nudging us toward growth, wrapped in moments that might make us blush but teach us so much. 

I serendipitously stumbled upon this poem this week by a beautiful creative. It's funny how the universe sends us signals in the midst of our maddening mind games to bring us back down to earth. Angels fly because they take themselves lightly! 

In our journey toward self-discovery, may we remember that mistakes are the humble footprints of our humanity. They're not missteps but rather stepping stones on our path, opportunities to learn and bloom. Each stumble, every fumble, is a chapter in our story—a testament to our resilience and our capacity for growth. So, as we weave through life's intricate threads, let’s not shy away from our mistakes but hold them gently, for within them lie the seeds of wisdom, the quiet strength to evolve, and the delicate fragments that make-up the mosaic of the 'me'.

Your comments, shares and messages mean the world to me; knowing these posts make even the tiniest difference fills my heart with overwhelming gratitude. I hope to write to you as often as I can but I am not sure what that timeline looks like yet. My only promise however is that any time you hear from me, it will be from my deepest heart, straight to yours. As always, if you are struggling, please consider reaching out to a trusted friend, loved one, or professional for support if needed. 

With warmth, peace, and abundant happiness,

Lauren x