The Peachy Dream Store

Hello everyone <3 Yesterday I began a new era of this beautiful space and platform which has helped me grow and develop so much. 

I started The Peachy Dream almost 3 years ago now as part of a dream to promote positivity, lovingly uplift the hearts of others and create a space of kindness, compassion and hope. It has helped me tremendously over the years and it brings so much light into my life when others tell me that my posts also illuminate any darkness in theirs. 

Over the past few weeks I've been working really hard on ideas in which I can further spread such messages of love and happiness in a fun and creative way that doesn't involve spending hours upon hours writing pieces in which many may not have time to read or digest in our busy world and was hit with the idea of creating pieces of clothing, stationary, utensils etc! I noticed I was always searching for the perfect comfy jumper that wasn't just pretty but also represented something I believe in. I believe in trying to do something everyday to help others and just imagine how many people you could reach walking down the street wearing a piece of positivity!

I have created 4 initial designs to start off and have a shop trial for 90 days, which I hope to be able to expand if some souls are interested and invest in some pieces. I have so many more design ideas, quotes, drawings and items I would love to create and of course would just adore your input too if you have any ideas or suggestions or requests! I am so grateful for this opportunity and really excited...I love trying new things and exploring my creative side and it's just amazing to be able to blend everything I love and stand for into one!

The link to my shop is below eeek. I have tried my very best to make everything as affordable as possible while trying to cover all costs. I hope these pieces may bring you or a loved one joy, strength and courage and remind you of the bright side of life! 

https://the-peachy-dream.myshopify.com



I hope you enjoyed and that you may like my peachy pieces!

lots of love & peace & happiness


Lauren x

Self Study Saviours

Hi everyone <3 I hope you are all as well and ok as could possibly be in this scary, worrying time. The whole world has come to a standstill due to the Corona virus and I think we are all very nervous and frightened of the unknown and uncertainty. I was going to write a little about how scary and worrying this time is for us all but I think it can just be so consuming and overwhelming and perhaps a more positive optimistic change is the more appropriate thing to do! With all this uncertainty and unknown it can be confusing and difficult to know what the next step to take is on our own winding paths but I think the most important thing we can do is to stay hopeful and optimistic; to look after and care for our loved ones and those must vulnerable in our community but also to focus on our goals and future hopes. Perhaps we can take advantage of this time of self isolation to slow down, work on ourselves and just focus on the little things we can do for each other, this world and our own beating hearts. I am so lucky and grateful to have a big majority of my readers in their late teens and twenties; the years of which are so often consumed by studying and learning. I know, even the midst of all this uncertainty, many people have exams coming up...at some stage in the hopefully not too distant future! Whether you are in college or school, being suddenly thrown out of your comfort zone and thrusted into a suddenly drastically different routine can be so tough and scary. Perhaps you thrive learning alone, can motivate yourself to wake up and sit hours on end at a desk and can muster the self discipline to keep on going day after day. Even if you can do all of those things, not having a definite goal pr date in sight and such uncertain change is really unnerving! But, if you are like almost every other human on earth and perhaps face some difficulties in trying to remain disciplined, calm, focused, motivated, hopeful and positive in your work life when the world seems to be falling apart around you, then I promise you you are not alone! I have written this blogpost (really just an accumulation of past writings) in the hope that it may help you a little bit if you are at home now and struggling to get into the zone of working towards your study goals and schooling needs. I hope this post may help you even muster a tiny bit of motivation, enable you to discover a new way of working or aid you in boosting your brain productivity. I wrote about mindsets and habits but also specific techniques and methods for learning. If there is anything that I can do to help you in anyway please please please message me. I am so lucky that I have no exams or work commitments so if there is anything I can do help lighten your load or aid you in anyway please ask <3 

I hope you enjoy this post; I am absolutely no expert on productivity or studying but I hope that maybe some of the things that worked for me may also help you! I hope you remember that no matter what, you are not defined by your work, productivity and stress levels. You are whole and enough in all that you are and your worth could never ever be measured by your achievements or results. The definition of success is extremely different and unique to every person reading this, it is both ambiguous and personal. I hope this post may help you on your own personal journey towards success, whether that be to simply make someone smile or to become the president! 

Imagine having notes as pretty as these!

Organisation Is Key

Being organised can come very natural for some, while for others it may be an extreme struggle. Perhaps you find yourself at the beginning of September, motivated and excited with your new pens and colour co-ordinated folders yet two weeks later everything becomes a muddled mess. I have always liked to be extremely organised and in control so I am lucky in certain ways but I think it is a habit that is really important for achieving your goals, especially if you are in an exam year. Being organised doesn't mean you have to have every single thing perfect and of course you can never be prepared for the unknown but it definitely helps a lot. To help keep you organised I would recommend keeping a journal in which you write down all work and study due. Dedicate a space to remind yourself of any upcoming tests or work that needs to be handed up. Create some sort of organisation system that works for you and your work...whether it be a folder for each subject or a cue card for each topic. At the beginning of every week I would write down certain things that I wanted to have revised or accomplished by the following Monday in a separate little notebook and would then assign those things to certain days of the week! Therefor sitting down each evening to my study I could also clearly see what I had preplanned out to revise for that day. 

21 Lessons in 21 Years

1. You may never feel enough. Throughout your whole life, you have trained yourself to believe that if you can just do this or just wear that or just look like them; you will finally feel worthy of this life. As long as you hold yourself up to your own self inflicted rules and all too high standards of which are impossible to attain; you will never be happy. It's scary to allow yourself to just be...to open your heart and to listen to the drum of its faint yet unchanged melody and to hear that this is who you are. You can either take yourself or you can try to leave yourself. You can't cry it away or eat it away or starve it away or walk it away or punch it away or even therapy it away. You can't leave yourself. This is you and the longer you try to deny that soul or change its very intrinsic being; the more you will suffer. And perhaps you may think like me, 'well I deserve to suffer if I must inflict this world with my presence'...dig deep enough within your heart and you will realise the truth, that that thought is the very core belief of not enough-ness within itself. You have to endure yourself. You have to live and love and accept all that you are...because who that is, really is pretty amazing.

2. You can not hate yourself into a version you will finally love. Self love begins with shining the light on your deepest darkest shadows and allowing them be seen, heard, felt and finally transmuted into sparkling shimmers of love. 

3. This too shall pass. Each dark dusk must end with a beautiful new beginning of light. No darkness will last for ever and neither will any pain. Sometimes it can all become so overwhelming...a simple moment becomes so consuming, so large and terrifying. In that moment, it encompasses your whole being and suddenly life itself seems so dark, inescapable and frightening. This is just a moment. This is not your life. This pain is nothing but storm clouds rumbling through the sky...soon to be replaced with beams of warm bright brilliance. I know the deafening thoughts are ringing through your ears, the flashes of fear are blinding you of seeing any good and the floods of tears are pulling you under; but just you hold on. Keep swimming. You will not drown for you have a lifebuoy just waiting for you to grab; hope.

4. You always have a choice.

5. Pain is the greatest connector. Psychiatric hospital taught me that there is no greater connector and soul bearer than pain. 'If I tell these private thoughts of mine, it is because I know they are not mine alone, and that practically everyone is trying to say the same things and that the writer is only a man who says out loud what other people think or whisper.' Sitting down for dinner with the six other patients on the eating disorder ward taught me how pain transcends all genders, ages, ethnicities and people. We all had different stories, different backgrounds, different lives yet one thing connected each and every one of us; we were each in turmoil, we all used food and our bodies as a way of escaping our inner pain and we were all fighting really really hard. I now believe that suffering supersedes all outward projections and inner beliefs. When I found myself being held by a lady 30 years older than me as I cried because the nurse had poured my milk just slightly above the required line, I finally felt understood and accepted. She understood the thoughts, the pain and the irrationality of the eating disordered voices; she had the exact same monster in her mind telling her the exact same things. We were so different yet so exactly the same. We would later spend the next five months being each other's daily cheerleaders as we came across challenges like a horrific St Patrick's day dessert that only we will ever understand and still giggle about to this day heheh...(long story including screaming at nurses and disgusting green (?!?) cream). I learned that pain strips back all outer facades and reveals the true vulnerable, scared yet sacred soul beneath. Whether you are rich or poor, black or white, young or old...we all have pain and we all endure suffering. How refreshing and reassuring to know that you are not alone.

6. As long as you hold fear, you will never be free. Where there is fear, lies opportunity. For fear is a beacon from your heart, pulsing with passion, waiting for you to grab its hand and run together in the direction of freedom, a path carved by your innate desire to be free. Fear is the greatest unrest within our souls. For how can we feel fully alive when there is a self inflicted restriction within us? As long as we hold fear, we will never be free. Only in facing our fears can we allow our toes to dip into a limitless world, one in which nothing can hold us back, because finally, we are not holding ourselves back.

7. Our thoughts are not always true, our feelings are not always real and our perception is not always clear.

8. You are your own biggest critic. If you spoke to others the way you speak to yourself, you would have no friends left at all. People don't see you the way you see yourself, both internally and externally. I am too busy worrying what you are thinking of me and you are too busy worrying what I am thinking of you. In reality, neither of us are thinking of another, just of what each other is thinking of each other...mouthful hehe. My best friend said something to me recently and it really really stuck with me. I was feeling upset about how I looked before we went out and she said 'Lauren you have looked at yourself in the mirror  for the past 21 years. You have inspected and analysed every single inch of your skin and crevice of your body. You can account for each and every of your own perceived flaws but will omit any possible beauty. You have taken these pieces and created a vision of yourself of which only hold. When someone looks at you, they don't see the you that you have torn apart, investigated and scrutinised for all those years..they see you with raw wide open eyes. They don't see you as dismembered pieces of flaws and failings but as one whole, unique and perfect person. They see you for the you that we all see and love and that hopefully someday, you will see too.'

9. There is no perfection, only beautiful versions of brokenness. 

10. Be love. 'The person in life that you will always be with the most, is yourself. Because even when you are with others, you are still with yourself, too! When you wake up in the morning, you are with yourself, laying in bed at night you are with yourself, walking down the street in the sunlight you are with yourself. What kind of person do you want to walk down the street with? What kind of person do you want to wake up in the morning with? What kind of person do you want to see at the end of the day before you fall asleep? Because that person is yourself, and it's your responsibility to be that person you want to be with. I know I want to spend my life with a person who knows how to let things go, who's not full of hate, who's able to smile and be carefree. So that's who I have to be. I have to be love.' (This quote just says it all perfectly).

11. You are a mirror. Like a different language, in order for you to communicate with anyone, you must have first learned the art of speaking with a new tongue. Similarly, in order for you to see the beauty in others, you must have first embodied that same beauty yourself. The good you find in others, is in you too. The faults you find in others, are your faults as well. After all, to recognise something you must know it. The possibilities you see in others, are possible for you as well. The beauty you see around you, is your beauty. The world around you is a reflection, a mirror showing you the person you are. (I have written more about this topic in my post You Are A Mirror).

12. Everything happens for a reason.

13. It's ok to be both. You are allowed to have whatever proportion of characteristics within yourself as you feel to be true. As humans, we may appear as a paradox of opposing beliefs, but that is the beauty of humanity, we are messy creatures. The different sides of us are not mutually exclusive but are rather intertwined as one to create the uniquely stunning people that we are. Like yin and yang, we are entities that need balance. We need both the peace in the wild and the wild within the peace. Allowing yourself to find a balance between the perhaps contradictory states within you rather than tip-toeing on a tightrope is what will help you find contentment and comfort in who you are rather than trying to fit into a specific idealised standard of who you believe you should be. 

14. You don't have to be pretty like her, you can be pretty like you. Just because she is pretty, that doesn't make your own beauty absent. Fairy lights are beautiful but so are feathers, yet their beauty is completely unique and different, they can not be compared; nor can you.

15. Change is the only constant. 

16. Kindness is the universal language of the world. 'Kindness what a simple way to tell another struggling soul that there is love to be found in this world'. A specific memory of true kindness and love will forever and ever be with me. One evening I felt so upset and I rang my mom crying. I was two hundred miles from home, tormented by my thoughts, lonely, hopeless and truly felt no longer able to continue to fight; all I wanted was for someone to take me away from all of the pain and fear. A stranger appeared like a guardian angel, she squeezed my hand and held a tissue to my eyes and then disappeared. I have tears in my eyes just thinking of this moment, it may sound like a small gesture but her kindness and compassion saved me that night. She was suffering too, she was a patient with all of her own issues, scars and battles yet in that moment she chose to remind me of our common humanity, our united suffering. I wish I could tell this woman how much her care meant to and still means to me. Thank you.

17. Everyone has a story. When you try to understand people and view their behaviour and actions through the eyes of love and compassion, you can then not only tolerate but forgive and send love to even the greatest of evils. Everyone has a story. Everyone has pain. We all do what we can to survive. Perhaps what one may do to get by in life may cause horrific pain, agony and suffering. While such hatred is horrible, when we transform that person who his tearing us apart into someone who is to be pitied and dealt with compassionately we can allow in peace and serenity to move on with our lives, to let go, forgive or focus on the beautiful positive people, things and memories we have and are yet to experience (I wrote a lot about this topic in my previous blogpost The Secret That Changed My Life).

18. The fear of suffering is often worse than the suffering itself.

19. To be vulnerable is to be brave, powerful, courageous. You have to open your hands if you want to be held. We all just want to feel connection, acceptance and love but how can we let someone touch our heart if we have built up impermeable walls around it? Vulnerability is terrifying, allowing ourselves to be seen as our true messy and unique selves is scary. Even finding the willingness to say 'I love you' first without any guarantee of a return is terrifying, however, such vulnerability is the only key that unlocks the gate to pure love and heavenly happiness. 'What happens when we open our hearts? We get better.'

20. Nobody can save you but yourself. It's up to you. I learned this after being discharged from my first admission; my favourite nurse held my hand as she said she was sorry for not being able to help me enough. She could see through the facades of fake happiness and knew I was falling hard and fast down the dark hole of relapse weeks before I had even left. Six months later when I met her on the corridors of the adult hospital she hugged me and kissed words upon my soul that were simultaneously earth shattering and liberating; 'You didn't choose to get this illness, but unfortunately and also fortunately Lauren, you are the only person who can choose to fight it and get better...it is all ultimately up to you'. 

21. We are all on our own journey. There are no set rules for life; no direct route, no perfect path, no clear map...just our inner compass gently guiding us in the direction of our highest good. We may find ourselves on the road less travelled, in the middle of a large open meadow. We could become immensely overwhelmed at the sight of the towering trees, the cacophony of the screeching crows and the smell of the wild evergreen. We could cry with fear over how scared we are, scream in anger at the world for placing us here and faint at the thought of all the different stony routes out of this clearing. Alternatively, we could pick up the budding yellow rose next to us and smile at its intricate beauty, laugh with the rhythm of the sweet sounding swallows and gaze in awe at the infinite, deep blue sky. The choice is ours, it’s just a matter of perspective. We may feel lost, scared and confused at our own life situations but that doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing, in fact this feeling could be the very thing that will set you and I, both, free.

Think of Yourself Less 

'Love only grows by sharing. You can only have more for yourself by giving it away to others'. While I am trying so hard to understand that one can not pour from an empty cup, I have always believed in and dreamed of helping and giving to others. I was recently watching a Yes Theory video with the Dalai Lama and his response to their question initially really upset me until I realised that the only reason it hurt was because it was true. It confronted my mind's attachment to its own suffering. One of my worst nightmares is to be viewed as or become a selfish person, however, mental anguish and, according to him even some mental illnesses, can be seen as an adapted extension of self-centredness. Even trying to explain this I feel upset because it makes me feel so so guilty. As someone who is recovering from mental illness and who has taken years to allow in the possibility that it's presence is not my fault, I find this learning throws me further into self hatred and disgust, but I don't think that that is what the Dalai Lama intends for people to feel either. I think his message meant that at times, as humans, we can become so wrapped up in our own little worlds that we forget about the one that is coexisting all around us. Such self-absorption can conceal the truth of reality and often our own thoughts and feelings become our basis of existence. What does your thinking look like? I don't think of you as much as you think of you, and you don't think of me as much as I think of me; the paradox is that I think of me so much because I worry about what you think of me and you think of you so much because you worry about what I think of you...yet we aren't really thinking of one another at all. We often only ever think about another when we are thinking about what another is thinking about us...I don't think my mind even understands that sentence hehehe. It is self centred, we are not thinking of the world, we are thinking of our world. We are thinking of a world which we have created in our mind that revolves around us; our core beliefs, our ingrained values and our inherent system of thinking. I think the Dalai Lama's teaching hurts so much because as human beings, it is in our intrinsic nature to think of ourselves. We are born alone and we die alone and so of course we view the world through our own perceptive spectacles. However, over the last few decades and centuries, the quality of the frames in which we view ourselves have dwindled, and thus we don't just think of ourselves...we hate, berate, attack and abhor ourselves. Such a grand statement, that our thinking has become self-centred and is the root of unhappiness, pain and even mental illness is perhaps so obscene only because it may be true. I don't think it is fair or accurate to say that mental illness is wholly self-centred. I am still learning and trying to accept the possibility that my own harmful thoughts are not selfish or self-centred but perhaps the instilled beliefs of which create such thoughts stem from a self-centred focus. I really don't know if any of this has made any sense ahhhh I don't think it makes sense to me but in my heart it does a little! Aside from the deep philosophical aspects of altruism and selflessness, giving to others also just makes you feel really happy, warm and fuzzy (you may like my previous post 'The Gift of Giving'). As we grow older most people do prefer to give rather than receive because knowing that you are responsible for another's smile is often a million billion trillion times more magical than being a receiver. I was doing some research on this and I just learned that a study has concluded a very high correlation between early death and a disproportionately high use of personal pronouns (me, myself, I)...if that isn't a reason to be more selfless I don't know what is!

Choose Your Thoughts

'We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves'. Our words are powerful magnetic beings of energy. Perhaps the two most powerful words in the universe are 'I am', because what follows, becomes. Our words have the ability to plant gardens but equally contain the potency to burn forests down. What we think, we become. What we affirm, we attract. It all sounds a bit metaphysical and allusive but whenever I start to doubt the power of my own voice and the sounds it emanates, I consider the influence of one single word; 'love'. As beings we are all really just craving and hoping for one thing; love. While love comes in different forms and doesn't always have to be verbal to be expressed, how many lives have been blessed, altered and benefited from the 3 syllables and 8 letters of 'I love you'. Isn't that powerful?! What's even more magical, is that each and every word which leaves our lips holds a vibrational energy. We understand the language of our tongues and so when we speak words of compassion and grace we emit a high positive frequency, but, when we speak words of bitterness and anger, we emit a low negative frequency. (I am trying to get into daily affirmations and the power of words more. I can't wait to write about my results and the power of the words in which I choose). A universal example which may help to understand: have you ever been at a party or about to go out with friends and you feel tired and fed up? You don't want to get ready, you don't feel excited to have fun, you just want to sit in front of the fire and watch Netflix like every single other night. But then, you get a phone call from your best friend and they completely change your mind frame. They tell you 'tonight is going to be amazing, we are going to have so much fun, you deserve to go out and have fun, you are beautiful and young and you only live once'. Suddenly that sense of dread morphs into pure glee. You play your favourite happy music and within the space of 60 seconds, your reality has altered from a negative to a positive state! It takes time and practice and a lot of trust to really implement this. Reading about quantum physics and learning of scientific experiments really allows my mind to trust this truth. I love watching videos on the rice experiment...soooo amazing!! Ok I've gotten so excited since writing these words and have convinced myself to do my own little rice experiment, create my own affirmation cards (perhaps I can create a deck of cards that I could share with you) and dive deeper into the magical power of our words!

Be Here Now

Be thankful for this moment, this moment is your life. This moment is all we have. I know it's such cliche to 'live in the moment' but it is true. As a recovering worrier, over thinker and perfectionistic planner (heheh genuinely think those should be things we should all try to be actively recovering from), living in the essence of each fleeting moment can be new and at times even scary. But as a beautiful angel told me recently; fear, nervousness and anxiety are all just feelings, tied together by a core thread of excitement. Each moment, being and thing is neutral, but the way in which we perceive it defines whether we experience it as positive or negative. For example, do you ever just look at something (for me it always seems to be when I look at trees) and see this object's meaning completely transform within your mind. It suddenly looses all pre-instilled objective meaning and it becomes so new, so raw, so complete and beautiful. The tree is no longer just a tree but it is suddenly an extension of yourself; a being of life with its own intricate soul. Or for example do you ever repeat a word so many times that it looses all context? Suddenly it no longer represents anything but a random collection of sounds from within. I am recently trying to apply this way of perception to every day little moments. Is it really that bad that it is raining or is it just because I have trained my perceptive mind to view it as a symbol of pain? Is my reflection in the mirror really so revolting or do I perceive that just because it is a pattern of thoughts that feel so real because I have trained my mind to believe that they are real. So many teachers say, 'change your thoughts and you will change your experienced reality' and that teaching is becoming more and more apparent everyday. If both psychiatrists, quantum physicists and spiritual healers are telling us to change the way we look at things and the things we look at will change..then it has to be true. Each moment is constant but the way in which we view it is fluid. That malleability itself is the very power that influences the stream of following moments which in whole create this very life. If you look in the mirror and cry at your reflection; the moments following that will be horrible...influenced by your own decision to believe something as negative. But, if you look in the mirror and smile at your beauty and inherent worth; the moments following that will be beautiful. Of course this can be so really tricky. How does one continue to smile upon hearing the news of a tragedy? How does one rejoice in the beauty of this world when they have just lost their home? How does one delight over their body when they can physically see it with their own two eyes as something to hate? Suffering, sadness and pain are inevitable but I think the importance of this teaching is learning that while we can and should embrace every moment and emotion, we should try our best to not allow our minds to attach to any agony. To feel, embrace and release. 

Rewrite Your Script

'If your mind carries a heavy burden of past, you will experience more of the same. The past perpetuates itself through lack of presence. The quality of your consciousness at this moment is what shapes the future'. In continuation of the last point, when we attach to the perceived pain of a moment, we can unfortunately subconsciously give that pain the space to grow; like a weed. If we allow the pain of one moment to manifest and transmute into every following moment, we carry a pain that eventually becomes meaningless. Suddenly years later, we realise that we are still holding the pain from a moment that occurred when we were young. That very pain becomes a filter of which we view our reality; thus creating more negative perceptions, and as a result more pain. It becomes the script of which we play out our life and anything that does not coincide with that script is either rejected our altered to align with our own truths...not the truth. Perhaps you may know someone who constantly seems to end up with draining or manipulating partners? This person may have an unknown internal script that they don't deserve love, perhaps something as small yet mighty as being rejected from a hug as a child created this belief system, and thus this person may continue to subconsciously attract horrible painful relationships and deny themselves of true happiness and love. Of course it is never obvious on a surface level but deep down when we dig, we can often realise that there is an underlying crux of held heartache. It's a vicious cycle that we all can and hopefully will evade through mindfulness, forgiveness, self compassion and love. I remember talking with someone once and I told them about something, which looking back now is so minor, from my past. I cried and cried and cried, over ten years later I still held so much pain from that moment and unknowingly, that moment had impacted on my belief system and infected the way in which I perceived my reality. Through recognising the attachment to that pain it became easier to understand why I have certain thoughts and beliefs..traced back to a single moment years ago! Is there any moment you can think of of which you still carry the emotions? Could you forgive the person/yourself, have compassion for your past self and notice how it impacts on your current life viewpoint? Then, can you let it go? It may take time to let such wounds fully heal, especially if they are deeply engrained, but I believe that even just cultivating attention and awareness is so truly powerful in itself. If you would like to learn more about this, I can not recommend 'The Power of Now' by Eckart Tolle enough..it is truly a life changing book! If you are unable to access it or perhaps don't like reading, he also has some amazing podcasts in which he also explains his teachings and outlooks!

This Too Shall Pass

Suffering is inevitable. Life is beautiful but it is also hard and then it is beautiful again and then it is hard. Life is in constant flow, a constant without any constancy hehe! No pain lasts forever and nor does any bliss, but in that realisation itself, we can find peace and joy. It is hard to remind yourself and trust that this pain is temporary. Some dark tunnels seem so deep and never-ending but I fell in love with this quote the first time I heard it and I think this alone can offer so much hope, 'the pain you have been feeling can not be compared to the joy that is coming'. I love to think of life as a heart monitor thing (so sorry I have no idea what this is actually called). Our hearts, the very essence of life itself, go up and down up and down...it's the natural flow of life. If we can remember that in times of pain and rejoice in it with gratitude in times of joy, life can become just so sweet.